What Divorce Personality Are You? Take The Test…

It's Free, takes less than 2 mins, and 84.7% of people say it helps

Free e-book: The First 8 Steps to healing from divorce

The Wonderful Benefits of Being Miserable

Posted on March 12th, 2015

Oh, being miserable! It’s a joy unto itself, isn’t it? In fact, misery is an art form that takes quite some time to perfect. But the end result is Just.So.Worth.It. This is why so many people try their utmost to cultivate misery to its optimum results.

Many of us don’t choose to feel miserable. Being miserable is something we have sunk into because we are actually feeling depressed. Being depressed is no laughing matter and if this is you, you need to get help to support yourself to get out of this bad state.

BUT sometimes we aren’t ready to get out of that bad space, until we have suffered enough. It’s almost like things need to get way more desperate and awful for us to take getting out of being desperate and awful seriously.

SO, how do we take this seriously? Do we need to continue suffering?

I was recently miserable but not quite enough to get help for it. I was just feeling miserable and wanting to stew in it. This is when I wrote this article as a way of mocking myself out of the state I was in. I often use humour to snap myself out of my crappy state and sometimes it works and sometimes not. What I do know is that confronting the truth about my state helps me to snap out it.

Bottom line:

If miserable: either snap out of it or keep suffering until you take it seriously that you need help.

SO, here is the conversational rant I had with myself. Hope you get something out of it and know that if you feel miserable sometimes – YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

Letter to myself

So you feel miserable…

I mean, when you’re miserable you don’t have to deal with quality time with the family. You don’t have to set your sights on the lofty standards held by people that aren’t miserable. Healthy relationships? Psshhh. A great career, financial situation, and being filled with joy? Absolutely not for you.

You don’t get to be happy when you’re miserable and that’s the very point of it! You aren’t expected to enjoy yourself, smile, or even try to have a meaningful conversation.

Sounds great doesn’t it? Well, hold your hats because it doesn’t stop there! There are so many truly wonderful benefits of being miserable and we’re going to take a closer look at those below. We’re going to take things one step further and even give you some advice on how to be at your most miserable—just in case you didn’t know.

Just some of the best benefits of being miserable

You’re lavished with attention

Undoubtedly the top benefit of being miserable is the undulating fans that lavish you with attention and compassion. People that have big hearts or are prone to a good guilt trip will absolutely help you; in fact, they’ll feel compelled to! Not just that, but they’ll listen to you, feel sorry for you and best of all—they’ll actually feel guilty even though they aren’t the cause of your misery.

You’ll always have company

You know what they say? Surround yourself with people that you aspire to be! Well, misery absolutely loves company. The best thing? The more miserable you are, the more miserable you’ll make the people around you. Hell! You’ll even attract new miserable people to you. Yes, there will be some people that fall by the wayside, but they just don’t understand how truly wonderful it is to be miserable.

You won’t experience disappointment

If you have already set your standards incredibly low, there’s no way that you can be disappointed. How wonderful! You won’t have to experience the loss of true, meaningful love because you’ll never let it in. How clever is that?

“This sounds awesome Adele! How can I get really great at being miserable?” One step at a time! Worry not, here are just some of the best ways to become well and truly miserable!

How to become the best miserable person you can be!

As mentioned, there are a few quick steps that you can take to become completely miserable.

1. Make sure you know good things won’t last

Good things certainly do happen, but make sure you know that they are only temporary. If you accidentally notice you’re happy, just make sure you know that it is but a fleeting feeling.

2. Make sure you know bad things are permanent

See, told you the good things don’t last! Something bad has happened, so make sure you take note of it and tell everyone about how awful it was, and how it happened. Bad things always happen and they last forever. Top tip: The more you let people know how bad things are, the longer they are likely to last.

3. Be aware that everyone has intentions to hurt you

Absolutely everyone is out to get you and best you remember that. Make sure you turn even the most innocent remark into a personal attack. They mean it you know!

4. Everything is for personal gain

You certainly shouldn’t help anyone else unless there is something in it for you. Also make sure everyone knows that others doing good are also getting personal gain.

5. Be terrified of your financial state

Constantly talk about how little money you have. Watch the news consistently and become a doom guru about the economic state of the world.

6. Grow your negative identity

Don’t worry about any really great characteristics that you have. Focus on the bad things or any problems that you have. You need everyone to know how depressed or anxious you are as a person.

7. Never feel or express thanks

If you have one mantra it should be that there is nothing to be thankful for. Sure, you have a job, a roof over your head and food on your table, but there is no space for gratitude in a world of misery.

8. Blame everyone and everything else

Always remember that there’s nothing you could have done to prevent how life has turned out for you. You parents set you up for failure by giving you the worst upbringing and the universe has always conspired against you.

9. Never enjoy the small things

Getting joy out of the small things in life is for shallow people! Never stop to smell the roses! Art, movies, wine, music—it’s all nonsense and doesn’t contribute to your agenda of perfect misery.

10. Only focus on you and what you’ve been through

Never let go of anything! Remember every little thing that has gone wrong in your life in and stew on that incessantly. Hauling around your baggage is absolutely key to living a life of misery.

Pro Tip: Ensure that you always pretend that being happy is the goal. You should also try to be yourself at some stage too. If you start to realize that you’re working towards being miserable, then you might actually get to thinking how ridiculous it all is and low and behold you may actually become happy instead.


After writing this rant, I snapped out of it as I realised I had suffered enough.

Sometimes we cannot snap out of it and if this is you, we are here to help. Get in touch and get support.

With you in service
Book a Clarity Call for any divorce or break up support you need,

check out our resources or our Videos on Youtube

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

← Back to Blog