Hi, my name is Meg…I’m a 44, an executive working in UK Financial Services (Financial Crime, Regulation and Risk) and a single mum to a 5yo boy who is my world. I did the Naked Divorce online course in April 2015 and it was nothing short of incredible! I’m an action oriented and results focussed individual. I didn’t want to spend endless hours going over childhood issues on a comfy sofa in Harley St with a CBT therapist. I just wanted to find a way to put my divorce behind me and move on so that I could continue to work at the top of my field without being hindered with emotional baggage. I’m well aware that if I just stuffed it inside and tried to ignore the pain (as I had done in the past) with a British ‘stiff upper lip’ approach that soon my ‘issues’ would negatively impact upon my credibility (and therefore my ability to provide the best for my son). Pretending I was FINE wasn’t going to work this time.
So I selected a Naked Divorce package that included one to one coaching sessions that compliment the online course with the founder, Adele. Even though it was online, it wasn’t cheap. However, the lure of a programme that claims it can undo the damage and free me up to lead an extraordinary life within 21 DAYS was too tempting for me to pass. So instead of hesitating, I trusted a friend who had recommended Naked Divorce and signed up. The cynic in me kept thinking the programme promises were too good to be true so I wasn’t, in all honestly, holding out much hope. But it was the most accessible to fit in around my other commitments and the quickest results programme I found so I went for it.
So what is the course? The Naked Divorce programme comes with a book that you read a chapter a day…and very specific instructions about how to do the programme including diet and sleeping habits that participants adopt as necessary for the programme to work. The first few days were exciting and yet a bit too touchy-feely for me. I realised I’d actually become numb as a coping mechanism – so actively focusing on the emotions of my pain was a challenge for me. My first call with Adele was incredible. She is so insightful and asked me really thought provoking questions and kept encouraging me to really feel what I was trying to suppress. This was scary for me. However, she was so passionate and I felt like she really cared about me getting the most from this programme. It was obvious to me that she wasn’t just doing this as a way to make money. I was astounded she was so on point and knowledgeable about the impacts of trauma. She picked up on things I was reluctant to express with laser sharp accuracy. She wasn’t interested in me getting superficial results – she genuinely wanted me to have the miracle results I dreamt for myself!
One of the elements of her programme is what she calls STEATs. STEATs are short-term emotional avoidance tactics and I realised just how many of my life-choices were made this way. It was a profound realisation for me. During the coaching session, Adele probed deeper snd I was able to discover just how pervasive this ‘coping mechanism’ was for me. Once I saw this, I was immediately able to make conscious choices again and this little insight alone was worth the cost of the programme!!
About mid-way through the 21 days, I asked if we could pause as I wanted time to reflect and just be with some of the things I has learned. She was OK with this and actually checked in with me to make sure I was still going forward.
By the end of the 21days I was UNRECOGNISABLE in the way I was acting, how I was leading my life and how I was able to interact with my ex. I was FREE! I felt so unburdened with the baggage of past trauma. Not only was I able to accept my divorce but I was able to create a new future that I was genuinely excited about. Life became an adventure again.
It’s been almost 3 years since I did Naked Divorce and I can still honestly say it was an incredible gift to give to myself and has allowed me to powerfully handle my divorce. I have very little bitterness about my ex and we are able to peacefully focus now on how we raise our son. I still find myself rereading parts of the book. And as you would suspect, I always
suggest to my friends who are going through a divorce that they do this programme!